The Shark Chronicals
by Car Skygar
Summary: Ch. 1- Harry and the Cable Public Access Channel~A funny thing that came to me as I was watching these ladys clog on that channel. Part one of the Shark chronicals.
1. Default Chapter Title

  
~~In the morning I am hyper. In the morning I channel surf. This is the sad result of cheesecake for breakfast and the public access cable~~  
  
  
  
  
Ron looked into the fireplace and then glancing back at Harry,"Are you sure?"  
  
"'Course I am!"he said,"I've always wanted to do this."  
  
"Harry, sharks are dangerous animals,"Hermione added.  
  
"Well, thats the whole point, isn't it?"  
  
"If you say so,"Hermione said,"But dont say I didn't warn you."  
  
"You know you could end up in the middle of the ocean, or a fireplace in atlantis, or in the middle of space."  
  
"Yeah, Rons right, Harry. Sharks dont even have fireplaces, wherever you come out is bound to be non- shark infested anyway. You'd never get where your hoping to by floo!"  
  
"I will so, just you watch,"Said Harry steping into the green flames  
  
"We're coming too,"Hermione yelled steping in too.  
  
"Yeah,"Ron said and joined them.  
  
"SHARK!"Harry bellowed the soot getting inhaled into his lungs.  
  
They began to spin fast bumping hazardously into eachother. It was more longer and painfuller than any of the other floo rides any of them had ever taken before. It seemed to last forever, but then they all landed hard on a green stone hearth.  
  
"Uggg!"Harry groaned as he proped himself up on his elbows to look around.  
  
It wasn't the ocean. It wasn't shark infested water. It wasn't even in he same country, Harry noted form looking out the window and seeing a spangled banner hanging on a pole outside.  
  
"Its the American flag!"Hermione screeched in an agitated voice,"Harry, you great prat! You landed us across the ocean!"  
  
Ron began to look around,"Nice place they've got here, anyhow, but it looks as if no ones home."  
  
"Yeah, we should get out of here,"Hermione said rubbing her bruised elbow.  
  
"Wait! Whats that sound?"Harry whispered. They all stopped to listen carefully ot the slight humming coming from the living room. They got up to investigate and found that the TV was left on. It was playing the Cable Access channel, #21 Ohio, the advertizement said.  
  
"Oh! So thats what these things do! They're really not that bad, like a photo in our world exept with a reason. Dad'll be pleased to know that, he has at least seven in the garage."  
  
"You mean to say you've never seen a TV before?"  
  
"Never knew what it was before is all."  
  
"Hold it, a shows coming on!"Harry said as the screen went blank and some country western music started to play. Soon there was a picture of a old lady, and the screen went on to say that these were clogging lessons.  
  
"Oh, dance lessons, like I could really use this,"Hermione said sarcasticly,"'Comon you guys, lets go."  
  
"No, I wanna see it!"Ron said grabbing her arm as she began to turn away.  
  
"Me too, looks funny,"Harry added.  
  
"Fine,"she said and sat down on the floor.  
  
"Now I'm a gonna show you what you'll be a doin' today,"Said the old lady in a country hick accent.  
  
Music began to play, a sort of country style normal people don't like, but Ron began to tap his feet and bob his head to the beat.  
  
"Ron, are you likeing this?"  
  
"So what if I am?"  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and reverted them back to the screen where a rather funky looking dance was going on. The lady had another senior friend up on the crude wooden platform with her, they were both wearing dark green skirts and T-shirts with the show's name on them.  
  
The music stopped and the first lady began to talk again."Now first move is a fancy double, heres how to do it..."she said and begn to do a complicated looking step slowly, counting by eights as she went.  
  
"I can do that,"Ron exlaimed standing up. And sure enough he could.  
  
Harry began to laugh histericly at the sight. Ron tap dancing on the white carpet of a strangers living room, and actually doing it right. His long legs would fly in and out and around, touching the ground the exact instant as the lady.  
  
So, it continued, Ron learning all the steps precicely, and Harry and Hermone laughing like nutters, untill the end of the thirty minutes when the lady anounced that is was time to put the whole show together. She turned the country hilbilly music back on and she and her friend (and Ron at the house too) began to dance in step perfectly.  
  
In the middle of the song Hermione stopped laughing just enough to hear the garage door going up,"Harry, they're home!"  
  
"'Comon Ron! We Have got to get tout of here!"said Harry, dragging Ron, still clogging, back to the fireplace.  
  
"No!"Ron cried,"I can't remember now! Was it step, double fancy, stomp, weave, toe? Or stomp, double step, double fancy, weave, stomp?"  
  
He pulled some floo powder from his pocket and they all got in together, shouted,"THE BURROW!" and dissapeared just in time. Leaving a teenaged girl and her mother to wonder what was with the black soot butt mark on the clean white floor, the footprints, and some very strange looking scuffmarks.  
  
~~ The End~~  
  
Crazy, yes, I know. But thats just what happens. :) REVIEW! Puh-leez? I beg of you~ I wanna know!  
  
~~ 


	2. Default Chapter Title

Pt2~HARRY AND THE WOODS NEXT TO MY HOUSE~  
  
Ok once again I am going to make a total blowout of this! I ususally write all descriptive and perfect, but today I'm just havin' some fun. I've allready written the prequal to this "Harry and the Cable Public Access Channel" ~Read it!~ The whole "SHARK" mystery will be unvailed soon  
  
:) Well here you go~~~~  
  
  
***  
  
Ron was talking to Harry in his bedroom at the burrow,"Oh 'cmon lets go back!"  
  
"Why?"Harry asked eying him,"So you can do some more tap dancing?"  
  
"N-No! 'Course not!"Ron said his eyes flicking to the side, a sure sign of lying.  
  
"You sure it isn't?"  
  
"Fine, you win, yes. And thats all I'm gonna say. Lets get Hermione and go."  
  
"No, Ron."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"It is an invasion of their privacy."  
  
"Not if we go in the middle of the day, instead of night like last time. You know, time zones, it'll be the middle of the night over there."  
  
"Whatever."  
  
Ron hopped up and down, literally. Plus he threw in a back double toe.  
  
"ALLRIGHT! Fine, just don't do that!"  
  
"Whee!"   
  
"Shadup!"  
  
"Lets go get Hermione"  
  
They (er-Ron) bounded down the stairs to the kitchten where Hermione was sitting braiding Ginny's hair.  
  
"Hermione, were going to go to the Shark place again."said Ron giving her a wink on the side of his head Ginny couldn't see.  
  
"Ron, do you really want to tap that badly?"asked Hermione. Ginny gave them all a strange look.  
  
"Yes I do for that matter."  
  
"Fine, lets go. If we get caught, you know that all the blame in on you, Ron."  
  
"Yeah, hurry we have to get there while it is still night."  
  
"Um,"said Hermione glancing at the clock and then the window. Ginny did the same, but got her words out quicker than Hermione.  
  
"Ron, are you on drugs?"  
  
Ron blinked firociously, and Harry snorted with laughter,"Yeah maby you are, why else would you want to go oversea to take tap lessons?"  
  
"I dont! It just that I've never been over there before, I want to explore."  
  
"What?"Ginny asked hesitantly.  
  
"Can I tell her?"Hermione asked the boys who nodded thier heads,"Ginny, Ron wants to take the floo overseas to he can take lessons and 'explore'"  
  
"Can I come?"Ginny asked, taking it all in rather quickly.  
  
"Yeah sure,"Said Ron, grabbing her by the arm and pulling her into the fireplace with him as he threw more floo powder in hurriedly. Harry and Hermione followed close behind,"Hurry!"  
  
"SHARK!"Harry shouted, causing there to be a mush of spinning.(geez, how many people fit in a chimney?)  
  
A lot of bumps and bruises later they were all laying on the green stone of the living room once more.   
  
"This is too wierd,"Ginny said looking around the dark and forboding house.  
  
"No, it isn't," said Ron jumping out of the pile of people and dashing to the telivision and began pressing all o fthe buttons crazily, all exept for the power button that is. A loud boom happened near him.  
  
"Ron! What was that,"whispered Hermione.  
  
"Um a black box, with this little tray that came out, and has got a hole in it,"he said, clearly puzzled.  
  
"The stereo?"Harry said. but then a sound came from down the hall, a faint shoe step gatting louder and louder and a little dog barked in side the house,"Run!"  
  
The whole troop ran out of the room and out the back door in the kitchen after Hermione said a simple spell, and from what they heard behind them, setting off an alarm.  
  
They ran as fast as possible to the shadowy woods they could see across the street. It was cold, cold, cold! Ron began to shiver and Hermione's teeth chattered nonstop.   
  
They found a little path not very far off and began to follow it back into the woods, Harry carefully keeping track of how to get back. The path twisted closly next to another house, the front yard was just dirt. Clean dirt none the less, but dirt anyhow.  
  
They spotted a solid dark and big object in one of the many trees ahead.  
  
Hermione heard a faint whisper next to her and turned around suddenly.  
  
"Intruders!"Cried a short brown haired boy. Right in her ear too, man did that kid have a loud voice!  
  
Yells came from all around enveloped them, no one guessing what was going to happen next.  
  
A stream of light from numerous flashlights shone on a window of the tree fort.  
  
"Do it Neil! Now!"Cried the blonde boy closest to Harry.  
  
Someone's end was stuck out the window speedily and his hands came down like lightning.  
  
"Oh my Lord!"Ginny cried as his knickers began to slide down too.  
  
"Ahhh!" they all cried, a blinding whiteness had forced them all to thier knees in pain, thier eyes closed as tightly as possible.  
  
~~~  
What will happen next? No one knows! ('cept me)  
  
Note: Yes, that was the tragic mooning! All this is based on some events that happened in my life, in case you didn't know yet :) Well I hope you liked it REVIEW (puh-leez?)   
  
Stay Tuned for the next installment in THE SHARK CHRONICALS-- Chapter 3-- Harry and the Vacant Dirt Bike Lot (guarrenteed for laughs- even though I admit this one was not so funny at all)  
  
Dont forget! Double toe, weave, back step!  
  
TTFN  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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